This is my son Jack's bookshelf. On it, he has typical things and then some not so typical things. You probably notice the two photos. They were taken in 2011 on a missions trip to Africa. What you might not realize from these photos is that all or most of these boys had tested HIV positive. So how could a caring parent like me allow my son to expose himself to disease-ridden children? Shouldn't I know better? I guess if I answered that question in the affirmative, I would have never gone to Africa in the first place with my children since most of the kids we encountered in Africa had some sort of disease/condition.
Africa was an important place for our family. For our children, it was an opportunity to see other children like them in very different circumstances. It has allowed my children to have a reference point regarding life and health and waste. When some parents tell their children, "Eat all of your food, don't you know there are kids starving in Africa?" that question is nothing but an abstraction for those kids. When I tell that to my kids, they remember the bloated bellies they witnessed from malnutrition and the one-meal-a-day starch, chicken head lunch the African kids had to eat. And so they continue eating.
But for me and my wife, we were still parents on this trip. We watched our kids roll in the dirt with the rest of the African kids. We watched them hug, grab, wrestle with kids who were suffering from HIV and TB. We saw them barefooted, running around where wood and splinters abounded, where glass or nails could protrude. We learned much about parenting this trip. We learned that we are to protect our children, but we cannot guarantee their safety, only God can. To assume we guarantee their safety would be to destroy their love to explore, to learn, and to trust God ultimately with their lives.
I read this article on "overparenting," and I agree with its premise, parents' are far too fearful over their kids' safety. Perhaps it is the saturation of media horror stories of kidnappings and perverts that are out to steal, kill, and destroy. But the article doesn't go far enough. I wonder if the reason we are so bound to our children's safety is our ultimate "worship" of them, their dreams, their concerns, their lives. Sadly, too many parents worship creating things (children) rather than the Creator of those created things.
Our kids made it home safely without HIV or TB. I look forward to their return to Africa. I know, however, that they can live here in this country without fear. I simply need to allow them to do so.
Africa was an important place for our family. For our children, it was an opportunity to see other children like them in very different circumstances. It has allowed my children to have a reference point regarding life and health and waste. When some parents tell their children, "Eat all of your food, don't you know there are kids starving in Africa?" that question is nothing but an abstraction for those kids. When I tell that to my kids, they remember the bloated bellies they witnessed from malnutrition and the one-meal-a-day starch, chicken head lunch the African kids had to eat. And so they continue eating.
But for me and my wife, we were still parents on this trip. We watched our kids roll in the dirt with the rest of the African kids. We watched them hug, grab, wrestle with kids who were suffering from HIV and TB. We saw them barefooted, running around where wood and splinters abounded, where glass or nails could protrude. We learned much about parenting this trip. We learned that we are to protect our children, but we cannot guarantee their safety, only God can. To assume we guarantee their safety would be to destroy their love to explore, to learn, and to trust God ultimately with their lives.
I read this article on "overparenting," and I agree with its premise, parents' are far too fearful over their kids' safety. Perhaps it is the saturation of media horror stories of kidnappings and perverts that are out to steal, kill, and destroy. But the article doesn't go far enough. I wonder if the reason we are so bound to our children's safety is our ultimate "worship" of them, their dreams, their concerns, their lives. Sadly, too many parents worship creating things (children) rather than the Creator of those created things.
Our kids made it home safely without HIV or TB. I look forward to their return to Africa. I know, however, that they can live here in this country without fear. I simply need to allow them to do so.